Hollywood Highlights: True Stories by Bill Bakaleinikoff ...
Hollywood Highlights:
True Stories by Bill Bakaleinikoff ...
It was the late forties, Marilyn Monroe was under contract at Columbia studios for I believe around $75 dollars a week. Garson Kanin (the writer and husband of Ruth Gordon) got her the job over the protests of legendary Hollywood 'mean man' Harry Cohen. Harry ran Columbia Studios like Il Duce ran Italy. Harry based his empire on his ability to trust his twitching ass. If he would like a script, rush, or audition film footage, he claimed that his 'ass' would tingle. Talk about anal retentive. My father, Mischa Bakaleinikoff, would joke "If some of these high-paid actors and actresses only knew that their career was all due to Harry's itching hemorrhoids".
When Garson introduced Marilyn to Harry his ass went blank. For some reason
Harry did not like Marilyn (he did later, in a big way) and Garson had to fight
like hell to get her on the lot and under contract. Harry signed the contract
but told Garson "Keep that plump never-is-going-to-be-nobody out of my
sight!" Garson was one of the few people who could get Harry to do
something he didn't want to do. It was Garson who brought Harry the script for
"It Happened One Night" in 1933 which later put the then-dingy little
outcast Columbia and its vulgar little tyrant on the map to fame and fortune. It
Happened One Night received the Academy Award in 1934. (another story).
On the Columbia lot Marilyn kept to herself and studied. When notified that
Harry was making the rounds Marilyn would find a place to hide so as not to get
a verbal insult from Harry (he lived at the height of his voice), who made W.C.
Fields seem nice to children. One of the places Marilyn would hide was my dad's
office, or if he was scoring a movie she'd sit in the orchestra pit (Mischa
Bakaleinikoff was a musical conductor at Columbia for over 30 years). She used
to love to come in and watch my dad score the movies. It gave her a chance to
look at other actors and actresses and pick up points of the craft. My dad had
scored her first movie at Columbia "Scudda-Hoo Sudda-Hay" in 1948.
Marilyn and Mischa became good friends.
One day, my parents were getting ready to go out when the baby sitter cancelled
at the last minute. Mischa called Marilyn and she showed up at the door about an
hour later. Marilyn Monroe was to become my brother's and my new babysitter. To
us, it was just another poor soul who we were going to break in. Our baby
sitters didn't last long. We were kinda wild. I answered the door with our dog Haltura (hal-too-ra) in
tow. Standing there was
Marilyn dressed like a bobby-soxer with her hair hidden under a scarf.
She really didn’t look any different than most of the other poor souls
who came to watch over us little monsters.
Marilyn smiled and asked if I was Billy and was that Haltura (the
well-known family dog, a Welsh Corgi). “Yes… MOM! THE NEW SITTER IS HERE”. It is important that I gave you some sort of layout of the
house because the house was (is) such a player in this story. In the daytime the house was brilliant, no, vibrant.
Beautiful art works, furniture gathered from around the world--Russia,
Mongolia, China, India… places where my father Mischa lived before he came to
America. The sun lighting up
stained glass windows in the turrets, the giant window in the living room
overlooking the Hollywood Hills; you could just sit and look around and pretend
you were living very nicely anywhere in the world.
But at night, think of every horror movie you saw as a kid. Boris Karloff’s shadow was everywhere. Many a baby sitter wet their pants with fear as the
house turned evil after dark. My
brother and I became fear mongers par excellence.
“Hi Marilyn” my
mother yelled out as she appeared in the large archway... ”Billy will show
you how to work the television set… Mischa is in the shower and we are
running late… we have to be at the Stoloffs at seven… Tony and Billy already
had dinner but if you are hungry there is tons of stuff in the ice box so help
yourself… if you want a drink Billy will show you where the bar room
is… thank you for coming… ” My
mother went back to her make-up room. Marilyn
followed me into the living room. Tucked
away and almost buried in the largest of the castle’s rooms was our prized
possession (mine and Tony’s), the 10” RCA television set. It sat on top of a small marble table next to a large
fireplace that you could almost walk into. Built-in book shelves guarded both sides of the fireplace and couches and
chairs and tables gave the room a fancy hotel lobby look. I
went right to the television set and turned it on.
I looked to see our new sitter’s face… we had one of the first
televisions in Hollywood. The
television set was also a principal player in my older brother’s and my
chamber of horrors. There were only two or three channels then and most
didn’t come on until after five. Old
movies (Charlie Chan, Eastside Kids, mostly B movies of the 1930s and 40s)
cartoons, and comedy shorts (Chaplin, Laurel and Hardy, Charlie Chase, Tom Mix,
Three Stooges etc) ruled the day and they never failed to grab the
babysitter’s complete attention. My
brother, Tony, appeared through the dining room arch by jumping over all three
large wide stairs. “Hi
Marilyn… I’m Tony… you want to see a Charlie Chan movie?”… Sure Marilyn
replied… Man you guys are lucky to have a television set… what
school do you go to? “Cherimoya” we chimed in unison. And then she asked the dreaded question… What is your bed
time? Smart baby sitters ask
before the parents leave; this way, it makes it harder for you to lie to them.
We didn’t answer. My brother was
a fast thinker. ”What school do you go to Marilyn?” You see, when you are under nine years old anybody over thirteen is the
same age and they all go to school. Marilyn
smiled and said she didn’t go to school but that she worked with our dad. Charlie Chan was coming to the rescue in ten minutes. It was now dark outside. The squirt gun was fully loaded and Tony had the perfect
rain squeeze finger action. A few
light taps with the index finger sent rain drops down from the giant rafters. Marilyn still didn’t take her eyes away after several drops were
clearly falling on her scarf and shoulders. The
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHs got louder and the rain increased. Marilyn wasn’t smiling, and she wasn’t scared…
hmmmm.
It was my turn. “Marilyn…
I
have to go to the bathroom too”. I
went through the foyer arch and headed to the main hall where I turned right and
tiptoed into the dining room. I
was the light man. I carefully
started to turn on and off the dining room light (this used to scare the heck
out of them) as Tony increased the ghost sound and rain. I couldn’t see Marilyn from where I was in the dining room. After about two minutes I crawled toward the arch while under
the dinning table for a look at our prey. She was gone.
She was not in
her chair. She wasn’t calling our
names either. I didn’t like the
looks of this. I quickly crept
around back to the hall and then went up the staircase to join Tony. All of a sudden the living room lights went
out… then all of the lights went out except for the glow of the television
set. Tony and I had never
been in the house when it was dark and to make matters worse we were always
scared to go into the sitting room because one of the maids said it was haunted. And now here we were on the balcony in the dark. And then we heard it…
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH… Down the stairs we flew, both of us screaming at the top of
our lungs… Tony got to the bottom first and hit the foyer light switch and
yelled… ”MARILYN … MARILYN” … Nothing. I was quickly at Tony’s side… our next plan
was to go to the dining room and turn on that light… the living room was too
scary when it was dark and the switches were mostly on lamps and hard to find. We made a dash for it. The light went on…
and there was Marilyn holding a seltzer bottle with a
big smile on her face… ”So, you want to play huh?”… She let loose
with a blast… SHE LET LOOSE WITH A TORRENT!... Our fear quickly left as we
went for our squirt guns… the battle was on. We came running back with our weapons but Marilyn had gone again.
It was turning into a hide-and-go-seek game. Tony ventured back into the living room and made it to the two big
lamp lights. She wasn’t
there. She wasn’t in the kitchen or the dining room
either… guns in hand we slowly headed down the hall.
All of a sudden the bathroom door burst open and like a commando from a
John Wayne movie Marilyn jumped out into the hallway and let us have it.
Our squirt guns were no match… we ran towards our bedroom with
Marilyn in hot pursuit… Tony reached his bed and grabbed for a
pillow… "PILLOW FIGHT!..." Marilyn put down the empty seltzer bottle and headed for the guest
room for her pillow… The pillows were flying for what seemed like hours. Our arms finally got tired and we were still soaking wet. Marilyn had won. OK Tony and Billy go get your pajamas on and brush your
teeth and then we’ll have a root beer float. Tony and I got dry, changed
into our pajamas, and then came out into the living room in time to see the
closing credits for Charlie Chan. Sitting
on the coffee table were thee large root beer floats with cherries on them. Marilyn came down the hall with two big blankets and sat down on the
couch. She was a great squirt
gun and pillow fighter and we knew we had met our match; we were prepared to
finish our floats and go to bed on time with out a fight. The couple who used to host the movies announced that the next movie was
going to be a western. Marilyn
looked over at us as she handed us the blankets… ”Want to stay up for the
movie?” We all curled up, Haltura jumped up to join us,
and we got buried in the western. Marilyn ceased to be a babysitter; she was one
of us. She was a star even before
she made her first movie. Bill
Bakaleinikoff
We lived in the Hollywood Hills then. I wouldn't call it a house. It was more
like a castle (especially when you were young) and technically it was. A Greek
shipbuilder (I think that is how the family story went) used to see a house
perched on a hill over looking the Mediterranean as a small, and very poor
child. He always thought to himself that when he grew up he would have
a grand house like that. He later came to America and made his fortune. He went
back to Europe, found the house, and bought the plans for it (1690... it was
old). He came back in the late 'teens and built the house in the Hollywood
Hills.
The house had turrets, winding stairs, a forty-five foot living room with a
cathedral-like ceiling and balcony leading to another room on the second floor.
The fourteen-room house was draped in Moorish architecture. It was cool. Baby
sitters hated it. It was a scary setting late at night for a typical sixteen
year old. The only bait my parents had was that we had a television, one of the
first in Hollywood.
My brother and I didn't help the situation. The balcony was water balloon heaven, along with ghost whispers and
other rotten things kids did at our age. Many baby sitters left in tears. Except
for one.
"Get the door Billy, that must be the new baby sitter... she works at the
studio with your dad... "
Part two
My mother, Yvonne, was in her "getting - the - make - up - on - and - selecting - the - final - dress"
mode as she appeared from the long hall that led into the foyer. The foyer was a rather large round room that provided a starting off
place to the rest of the castle-like home. To the left of the nine-foot Moorish-looking front door was a
corresponding Moorish arch that introduced the five large and wide stairs that
led down into the living room. To
the left of the arch was a smaller one that was the entrance to the winding
staircase housed in the main turret. It
was a dark staircase that would conjure up images of the Tower of London.
It led to the third-floor balcony, with its hand-carved railing, that
over looked the cavernous living room below and up to the giant wood rafters
above. The third floor also had a
large sitting room, bedroom, bathroom and outdoor balcony. On
the ground floor to the left of the stairway was the largest of the three
arches. There were six very wide
and low stairs that led up into a second foyer that featured the main hall (the
castle’s main artery). The
hallway connected the bedrooms, bathrooms, bar room, downstairs staircase, and
the dinning room, which had a giant arch leading into the living room. (The
dining room was under the sitting room).
oooooooooooooh.